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8BEDC776-DF87-422C-863D-E2B1747E2344This is probably the most real blog post that I’ve done in years.  As of January 2018 my life has changed. For 30 years my life was all about a long time marriage, teenaged kids, a decent job and  a pretty decent quality of life.  It didn’t occur to me what would happen if I ever found myself single again. Now 7 months later here I am.  I am a  48 year old woman still adjusting to her new life which feels strangely like starting out as a naive twenty-something minus the toned body and the carefree attitude! 😏 The online illusion of a perfect and happy life is kind of normal these days. No one really knows what goes on unless you’re willing to disclose it. At the beginning of my new single life I felt free. I had a credit card I used to give me the illusion that nothing had changed, there was so need to change my quality of life. I thought wow, this isn’t so bad.  Fast forward 7 months later, that same freedom 48 credit card makes my life miserable. The debt and the interest is killing me. Paying cash for everything is a cruel experiment that everyone needs to try.  😂 It’s humbling when your 19 year old daughter knows more about budgeting than you do 😂. Don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful.   I always thought I had an ok job until I was faced with the expense of paying my own rent, phone, car, insurance, groceries, it’s been an eye opener. Let’s not even talk about online dating. The internet didn’t even exist the last time I was single! 🤣 I’m not suggesting I’m living in poverty I have a roof over my head and a job but it’s not easy.  I fell upon instagram by accident in an effort to keep an eye on my teenagers. Little did I know several years later and 9000 followers that I might be called an influencer? public figure of some kind? I like to think I’m just a girl who likes to share what she likes and others seem to like that? 😆.  In my mind I’m a middle-aged  woman who likes to thrift and who thrives on creativity.  Despite appearances, I live a normal life, I don’t get paid to blog or post on Instagram but not saying that would be something I’d turn down if the opportunity was there. Truthfully.  some weeks I’m running low on toilet paper and groceries. Frankly it can be damn depressing at times. I guess the point of this blog post is to reinforce that despite how perfect our online life may appear, the real story may be a huge departure from what appears in the meticulously edited pictures online. We all have our own struggles in life and the story you want to tell is up to you, I’m ok with being an open book.  I’ve been very open about my stuggle with anxiety and depression. It’s something I’ve dealt with my whole adult life, it’s part of who I am.  If it helps someone else knowing that they are not alone, that makes me happy.  I know that I’m very grateful of the continuing support that I’ve received from others. I know that I may not quite be where I would have liked to be at this point in my life but I’m well on my way on road to happiness despite stumbling along the way ❤️ xo Lynda

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http://www.instagram.com/lyndeestyles

 

 

 

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